Day of the Dead (2008)

I have a love of zombie films. Ever since I played the first Resident Evil on the PlayStation I was captivated, and quickly picked up George A. Romero's original Dawn of the Dead soon afterwards. At their best, zombie films can be scary, thrilling, disgusting, disturbing and altogether a terrific experience. With Day of the Dead however, we see the genre at it's worst.

As a remake of one of Romero's films, this was never going to compare favourably, but seeing as this was directed by Steve Miner (who directed one of my favourite B-Movies of the 80's, Warlock) I wasn't expecting something as truly awful as this. Don't get me wrong here, I'm not saying this is terrible because I'm a purist (I loved Zack Snyder's take on Dawn), this is just a genuinely horrible film. It's like Flight of the Living Dead without the charm of David Chisum and Kevin J. O'Connor to make it bearable.

Miner has never been a terrific director, but I'm just gobsmacked at this. It's as if he tried to do a more modern 'MTV' style film with choppy editing and music video camera movements, yet it falls flat on it's face. The footage in action sequences is sped up, making the undead look hilarious, running and flailing wildly, and it comes off as if the film should be set to Yakety Sax. Honestly, it makes Lake Placid look like a masterpiece, what happened here Steve? This is House of the Dead kind of bad.

The cast are altogether horrible. About as unbelievable Mena Suvari is as a soldier, Nick Cannon managed to make her look like a veteran, his stereotypical 'mouthy black guy' character just made me want to punch him right in the face every time he was onscreen. How this idiot is let anywhere near films is beyond me, it's almost as if he was just goofing around onset and they just filmed scenes around him, such as in one scene Cannon is holding a gun in each hand, one of which is a pump action shotgun. What kind of stupidity is that? The only decent actor in the whole thing was Ving Rhames, but they kill him off fairly early, so we're left with a cast of horrible actors playing annoying characters for most of the film.

I'm not sure words can aptly describe this abomination, it's inexplicably bad, and I've not even mentioned how the zombies on show here are able to climb walls and ceilings for some reason, are inhumanly fast and leap like cats. If that wasn't enough, the visual effects are diabolical, looking like a particularly bad video game at the best of times. Good god, just see something else, anything but this, don't even watch Day of the Dead as a curiosity to see how bad could it really be. It beats watching paint dry, but just barely.

Tropic Thunder

2008 has been a fairly good year for comedy films. Yeah, I know it's the year that brought us Meet the Spartans and Disaster Movie, but when you've got this and Step Brothers, it's enough for you to thank your favourite Deity that funny films are still being made in spite of Friedberg & Seltzer's best efforts to remove laughs from comedy films.

Tropic Thunder does exactly what it says on the tin, it makes you laugh. Very hard. When it's not making you laugh, it throws in enough action to keep you thrilled. There's a magnificent amount of satire, and self referential fun poking at actors, producers and other film business types. This is Hollywood laughing at itself.

The biggest burn of the entire film though, is certainly Tom Cruise as the abusive, amoral, big shot producer Les Grossman, who seems to be a parody of the much loathed Harvey Weinstein. Cruise just about steals the film in his 10-odd minutes onscreen, he's just hilarious, and I'd imagine Harvey would be red in the face and fuming over it.

I think it's odd how controversial the film has been, people taking offense at Robert Downey Jr. as a Black character (well, as a white character playing a black character), or the use of the word retard. It never ceases to amaze me how quick some people leap to outrage. Some of the funniest moments of the film are the ones that are the most controversial, the scene where Ben Stiller and Downey's characters are talking about playing mentally disabled roles is one of the best pieces of Hollywood satire in the film.

It's rare enough that a comedy has as many standout scenes as this, the fake trailers at the beginning are just pure brilliance, especially one which features Robert Downey Jr. alongside Tobey Maguire. That said, there was the odd moment where I was the only person laughing in the cinema, so maybe it just tickles my funny bone more than others, but I can't fault it for that. For me, it delivers gloriously.

Black Sheep

Black Sheep is a Kiwi made Horror/Comedy from director Jonathan King about genetically modified killer sheep, who turn humans into were-sheep when they're bitten. It's about as silly a concept as you could possibly get, but props are due because it's definitely a novel one.

I find with most films that mix horror with comedy, it's quite hard to get the balance right. A lot of the time they're simply not funny enough, and the horror elements can be extremely weak. In the wake of Shaun of the Dead, a lot more film makers seemed to have tried their hand at it, but never really matching the horror/comedy so perfectly, and while I did like it, I can't say that Black Sheep was really a great success either.

Like the UK film Severance, it just wasn't half as funny as it could have been, some of the humour seeming forced at times. Indeed, some of the best chuckles I got was from shots of the sheep themselves filmed in a menacing way. What makes Black Sheep work so well is the pacing, it's got that enjoyable romp feel that Tremors had, and although not as good, it's quite an exciting ride.

The practical effects from Weta Workshop sometimes recalls An American Werewolf in London, and although looking quite rubbery and fake in places, it works well on the whole, with CGI shots being kept to the minimum. It's definitely going to win a lot of points with horror fans who are tired of substandard computer effects that are all too prevalent in the genre these days, so the puppetry and makeup are a huge win for the film.

Acting isn't a strong point here though, as the cast generally ham it up to ridiculous levels, but there's enough charm on offer that I felt the characters likable despite themselves. Nathan Meister and Danielle Mason as the lead characters manage to stay on the right side of naive to be endearing rather than annoying, although cut it close sometimes.

I'd say that Black Sheep is about as camp as a film can get, yet still remains enjoyable. I wish that there were more laughs on offer though, especially when you compare it to the quintessential Kiwi comedy/horror Braindead. It's a fun romp none the less, packed with plenty of gore, and at a push it's a bit of a commentary on genetic engineering. It's not a particularly great film but you could certainly see worse.

A new George A. Romero film? Yes please!

Update - Seems this is a sequel to Diary of the Dead, but not a direct sequel. In an interview with Schlock around the Clock, George says "I’ll stick with this starting-over idea" and that "It starts with the blonde who drove away and the national guardsmen who robbed the people."

Thanks to the guys at Bloody Disgusting for this.

So, George A. Romero is back doing another zombie film? And it's not, as was previously reported, a sequel to Diary of the Dead. Even better! Count me among the eagerly anticipating. While I enjoyed Diary (You can read my review here) I just didn't feel it was as good as his previous films, and Spanish horror [Rec] beat it at it's own game. So I'm hopeful this new film won't be using the point of view technique.

Now, the article at Bloody Disgusting mentions that this is a quasi-sequel, but just what does that mean? Well, George had spoken before about his desire to do a sequel to Land of the Dead so maybe this could be it? That's something I'd dearly love to see, as the evolution of the genre is what endeared both Land and Day of the Dead to me so much.

It's not something I'd hold out too much hope for, as Diary was very much a reboot of the series, so I don't know if he's going to return to the chronology that he sadly abandoned. All I know is that whatever shape this film takes, it'll be worth watching, as I've yet to be let down by one of Romero's zombie outings, and after 5 films, that's impressive.

The Chaser

Chugyeogja, 2008, South Korea

A lot of film fans from the UK and Ireland will be familiar with Tartan Video, and more specifically their Asian Extreme line of releases. Having released the likes of the Vengeance Trilogy, Ringu, Takeshi Miike's output and Battle Royale, they soon became applauded as one of the best offbeat film distributors. Unfortunately, as time went on many began to bemoan these kind of films, as less stand out films appeared and more and more generic Japanese killer appliance horror films appeared (how many damn murderous phone films can we have?). There were still a load of fantastic Asian films appearing, but they were sometimes hard to pick out from the clutter of inferior genre movies.

Alas, Tartan went bust earlier this year, but had they not gone under it is highly likely they would have picked up The Chaser. This is the kind of film we associated with the peak of the Asian Extreme label: gritty but intelligent thrillers that feel like true originals.

The Chaser is the kind of film where it probably is a bit mean to give away much of the plot (although the poster tagline unfortunately reveals the first two acts of the film right off). But it is a police thriller of sorts, the main twist being that it plays like the opposite of most films of the sort (lets just say it isn't the killer being hunted here). It is an intriguing premise, and while there is still a race-against-time formula at play, it is different enough to hold your interest throughout.

The closest point of comparison would be Seven: this is a bleak, largely uncompromising thriller. It doesn't buy into the excesses of Oldboy or A Bittersweet Life: this is a more realistic look at the Seoul underworld. There is prostitution and violence, but it isn't stylised like those other movies. It is just... unpleasant. In fact, some of the sequences - though far more subtle than the squid eating of Oldboy - are more shocking than any of the others: the deaths here are awkward, messy and quick. It isn't easy viewing, and if you for some reason have a phobia of hammers, I would advise you to stay away.

While the film stays realistic and gritty, it still creates a good noirish atmosphere. The rain here is powerful and sinister, while the streets feel claustrophobic and dangerous. This isn't a love letter to Seoul by any stretch of the imagination, but the imposing neon signs, dark alleys and seedy characters really add to the tone of the movie. And yet it isn't all bleak. In fact, a good half hour in the middle unexpectedly contains a good few laughs, the film momentarily becoming a farce (including, but not limited to, a running joke about a mayor getting shit thrown in his face). And while the police incompetence is pretty funny for a while, you soon realise that in many ways this film is a scathing satire: a swipe at an inept police force in which a sole vigilantie can have more success that an army of policemen.

The most noteworthy thing about The Chaser, though, is the wonderful characterisation. The characters that populate this world have depth, which really involves you in the narrative as it continues to unfold, one pessimistic twist after another. Yun-seuok Kim is initially an unlikable and unsavoury character as the titular Chaser (ex-cop, now pimp) but as his search continues throughout the night and morning he reveals an impressive amount of depth, his motivations and frustrations believably increasing as the hours close in. And Jung-woo Ha's serial killer also proves to be a memorable psychopath, a brutal police interrogation scene in particular hinting at the reasons behind the horrific crimes he has committed.

The Chaser may be another Korean thriller (quite common these days) but don't let that put you off. It is impressively original, atmospheric and intelligent. Well drawn characters and an unusual, pessimistic plot will keep you enthralled. Predictably and depressingly the tag line of the film boasts that a remake 'by the team that brought you The Departed' is forthcoming. And while I for one really enjoyed The Departed, I feel it is largely unnecessary to remake this one as it is superb as it is (although the presence of subtitles automatically denies it the wide release it deserves). Should The Chaser be playing nearby, check it out before the possibly watered-down remake appears. In one respect, at least, the tagline is right to boast: "there is only one original".

Death Race

This is a pretty hard film to review. Death Race is a completely unimaginative, poorly acted and hugely predictable slice of nonsense. And yet... did it ever promise anything else?

In synopsising this film, the title does a pretty fucking good job. There is a race, and there is death. People race, people die. This all takes place in a prison, because it is apparently morally justifiable to throw a load of prisoners into said race (with death) whereas it would be frowned upon to put the general public (or CONSUMERS as the hilariously non-subtle subtext concerning corporations and television viewers would have us believe) into the same situation. The main character - played by a grumbling, borderline indecipherable Jason Statham aka Jensen Ames aka Frankenstein aka the good guy - has also been framed for murder and has a daughter back in the outside world: y'know, character development. The plot is inconsequential, and mainly an excuse for carnage.

At first I thought it unusual that the film resembled a more twisted and profane version of Mario Kart. But then I remembered the director was good old video game fan Paul W.S. Anderson: bane of Resident Evil fans and soon to molest the good name of the Castlevania series. So in fact it seems like he wanted to make a Twisted Metal movie (aka a more twisted and profane version of Mario Kart) without paying for the rights. And that’s what Death Race is: four extended video game kart races, complete with (and I crap you not) power up / weapon tiles to drive over. Hit the mark, access your napalm. Weird.

Car go boom now?

It may seem like I'm being a bit sarky about this film (apologies for that) but in a way the stupidity is sort of fun. It isn't like the film pretends it's intelligent: it just does what it says on the poster. Death. Race. If you are going to this film expecting anything else than that, you are seriously in the wrong place. Nothing intellectual here, move along!

If there is one criticism here that doesn't seem completely and utterly futile (and c'mon, if there were any reviewers bemoaning a lack of originality here, this really wasn't for them) it is that Jason Statham puts in a jaw-dropping poor performance in a film populated by laughable acting (even the relatively respectable Joan Allen can't add anything to her awfully written lines about moral righteousness). It may just be the weird sound recording that makes his voice seem detached from his mouth, but to me his mutterings resemble a particularly complicated form of gibberish. I really hope that Hollywood stops casting him in what seems like 50% of every genre flick coming out recently. I'm all for more Crank, but seriously mate, open your goddamn mouth.

So: Death Race. Death. Race. Badly directed, badly acted, badly written and with an embarrassing array of one-dimensional ethnic minorities as the participants. And yet, entertaining in a crude sort of way. I cannot honestly say anymore than that: it would feel futile to even bother criticising this film in any depth. You may well hate this film, but catch it in the right move and it is a good old fashioned slice of B-Movie nonsense. I for one pretty much discarded it from my brain as soon as I left the cinema after an hour and a half of moderate entertainment, but it does do what it sets out to relatively efficiently and inoffensively. If the combination of the words Death and Race intrigue you, you will get your monies worth. If not, you may as well avoid. Unless you are curious to see what a film adaptation of Mario Kart would look like. Answer? Death Race!

Fido

Any film that has a scene where one of the characters is addressing a class of children and asks "How many of you have ever had to kill a zombie?" is off to a terrific start. As a pitch-black comedy/horror, it could have ended there and then and I'd still be impressed.

Fido takes place in a post zombocalypse world, where the surviving humans, fenced into little happy little 1950's American suburban towns, are living out their day to day lives with domesticated zombies doing all the menial tasks. Children are gleefully singing "In the brain and not the chest, head shots are the very best" as they take their marksmanship classes.

We find that the Robinson family are no longer the only ones on the street without a zombie, as Helen Robinson (Carrie-Anne Moss) introduces her husband to their new zombie (Billy Connolly). Their son Timmy (K'Sun Ray) quickly develops a bond with the zombie, and he names him Fido after he saves the boy from a pair of bullies.

What I find the most fascinating about this film is the whole world the characters live in. Bill Robinson (Dylan Baker) is a man who's preoccupied with funerals, because as we find out, only the privileged get to be buried, everyone else is kept for domestication when they die. He's saving so that he and his family can all get funerals, but he's almost oblivious to them in the here and now. His concerns over the worst case scenario are somewhat like the craze for fallout shelters during the cold war. Overall it's very much a satire on suburban life in 50's America. With zombies.

For the most part the cast are great, especially Connolly as the title character, who translates a wealth of emotion despite not speaking a single word the entire film. The biggest failing lies with child actor K'Sun Ray as Timmy, who is just irritating for the most part. The greatest scene stealer is Tim Blake Nelson as the next door neighbor Mr. Theopolis and his zombie sex slave Tammy. He plays such a lovable pervert, loathsome but endearing none the less, and I don't know why don't see more praise for Nelson, he's terrific.

It's definitely a film you're either going to love or hate, because I can't see anyone who isn't a zombie fan to begin with getting a lot of the jokes in Fido, it's definitely unique in it's sense of humour, and certainly won't appeal to everyone. The dialogue is amazingly kitsch and hammy yet very clever, Henry Czerny especially manages to deliver his lines with such po-faced, deadpan conviction, it makes them all the funnier. He remarks when talking to his new neighbors how he'd take his wife's head off in a second if he had to.

Comparisons are going to be made with other zombie comedies, so I'll say it's not as good as Shaun of the Dead or Braindead, not as rapturously funny or grossly horrific as either, but it's still exceptional and to be fair, most comedies wouldn't compare well with Shaun. That said Fido will certainly find a place with horror fans, definitely worth a look if you're into your zombie films, and while it's not perfect, it's still a little gem of a film. I nearly want to just go straight ahead and watch Fido again, I loved it.

Step Brothers

I'd like to start off by saying that this film is freakin' hilarious. It's out of breath, my face aches from laughing kinda funny. I was laughing so hard at some parts, if I had been drinking a beverage at the same time, the person in front of me would've been nose blasted with coke. So be careful if you're eating popcorn, because there's a very real danger of choking. Yes, it's safe to say I loved Step Brothers.

It's a film that exceeded my expectations greatly. I'm a fan of Judd Apatow comedies in general, but last time writer & director Adam McKay got together with stars Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly, the result was perhaps the lesser of the Apatow produced films, the very hit-and-miss Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby.

The chemistry between Ferrell and Reilly is just terrific, the way they play off each other is terrifyingly funny, and the gags come so fast and consistently, there's rarely a down moment in the film at all. Will Ferrell has rarely been this funny, so I think it's clear that he's at his absolute best as part of a team.

The supporting cast is terrific as well, Adam Scott plays the smug, arrogant and successful brother of Will Ferrell's character, who really is amazingly loathsome and his performance seems like a send up of Tom Cruise. In one painfully fully bathroom rendezvous, Kathryn Hahn pretty much steals the show in one fell swoop. Richard Jenkins and Mary Steenburgen have their moments as well.

The plot isn't much to talk about, with our main characters being middle aged men obsessed with kids stuff, there's shades of the 40 Year Old Virgin, and the part about them having to grow up and get jobs is more than reminiscent of Knocked Up. There's even some very Parent Trap-ish plotting towards the end, so it's not going to win awards for being original. Still, with a film that's as rapturously funny as this, it's not much of a criticism.

It's going to be very hard for McKay or Ferrell to follow this one up, it's just brilliant. If you want a good laugh, then see Step Brothers.

[Rec]

One of the most terrifying films in years, or so they'd have you believe. I'll be honest, I was somewhat sceptical about [Rec] before watching it, but there's no two ways about it, this really is one of the most tense, frightening and brilliant horror films I've seen in years.

What had me sitting with my cynic hat firmly on was the fact that this was another point-of-view film, in the same vein as Blair Witch or Cloverfield. It's something I've felt was never pulled off in an entirely convincing manner, at least to my eyes. With George A. Romero's Diary of the Dead for example, I found the use of the handheld camera contrived a lot of the time, and it served to take me out of the mood.

This is the first film of it's kind that I've seen where I had been completely and utterly gripped rather than distracted by the camerawork. Maybe it's the fact that we're following a reporter, and the time frame of events is a small one, so the believability of holding onto the camera and to keep filming is more grounded. Hats off to directors Jaume Balagueró and Paco Plaza for this fantastic and very convincing effort.

Is it frightening? Well, I watched this with four other people and a number of interruptions during the film, yet it still managed to have me extremely on edge. Normally a film will only scare me if I'm watching it on my own, but [Rec] almost completely sucked me in in spite of the company, the ratcheting tension just kept building until the end and for a good while afterwards my heart was beating quite fast. So yes, it's damn well frightening as they come.

There's very little to criticize about the film, it's just one flawless example of a horror done right. It's short at only 75 minutes, but that's inconsequential as it has perfect pacing that just keeps cranking up the tension before building to a head. It doesn't stop for silly explanitory dialogue, events happen and the characters react quickly, and when another film might pause to establish that these are zombies and you have to shoot them in the head, [Rec] simply doesn't. It's a refreshing approach, and one I wish more film-makers would take.

Magnificently brilliant, I can't think of another horror that's left me this gobsmacked in a long time, not since A Tale Of Two Sisters have I felt this strongly, and that's high praise.

Babylon A.D.

A quick glance at metacritic or rottentomatoes and one thing quickly becomes apparent, reviewers dislike Babylon A.D. immensely. In fact dislike isn't strong enough a word, they despise it with such venom that it makes you wonder if this may very well be one of the worst films ever made. Even the films director and screenwriter, Mathieu Kassovitz isn't a fan, describing it last week as "pure violence and stupidity" after viewing the studios cut which removed 15 minutes of his film.

Babylon A.D. is a film which I had looked forward to since first hearing about it over two years ago and even after all the delays my anticipation reached fever pitch when the truly excellent trailer was released. It had everything I look for in a film and I will admit that my heart skipped a beat when first I saw it. Sitting down last Friday to watch the film, I was instantly enthralled by the truly awe inspiring opening scene which literally took my breath away. The slow panning shot from a satellite right down into Vin Diesel's retina as fire engulfed him is one of the most visually impressive shots that cinema has ever produced.

From here we skip to an Eastern European slum where we we meet our hero, Toorop played by the ever dependable Diesel. Before the credits even finish our hero has all ready informed us of his death, made some delicious looking stew and killed an old friend in one of the coolest moments in cinema this year. In fact Babylon A.D. features two of my favourite moments of cinema from 2008, within the first 6 minutes, not bad for a film getting worse reviews than Meet the Spartans. From here the story really gets moving with Toorop offered an opportunity for a fresh start and the chance to save the world. Torrop finds himself escorting a young girl, Aurora (Mélanie Thierry) and her minder (Michell Yeoh) from a monastery in Outer Mongolia all the way to New York, along the way they encountering the usual array of obstacles so beloved of modern sci fi.

Mathieu Kassovitz is a truly talented director as he has proven in the past, most impressively with his powerful debut La Haine, which to this day remains one of the most potent and powerful films in the history of cinema. From the get go its obvious that Kassovitz has a truly unique eye for framing the action but a rather loose grip on the story. The film jumps from one action sequence to the next rarely giving us time to decipher what exactly is going on and how everyone fits into the onscreen mayhem. The blame for this cannot all be placed on Kassovitz as it's blatantly obvious that the film has been taken and severely cut by someone whom has no idea what story structure is and may very well have been born blind. The film comes across as a bargain basement Children of Men only rather than rely on the story the emphasis is placed firmly on making things go boom. The plot is a random pastiche of everything that is good and bad about modern dystopian sci fi cinema and the abrupt ending which hints at a much bigger meaning to it all is quickly passed over in favour of making some more things erupt in flame.

Even when all this is considered the film just about works. The sheer amount of insanity on display manages to keep the film entertaining as we carelessly jump from one explosion to the next rarely stopping long enough to catch our breath. And certainly never long enough for the plot to make anything near sense. But even with all the films shortcomings, the sheer spectacle on display was enough to keep me thoroughly entertained from start to finish. Babylon A.D. is far from a good film but if you can leave your brain at the door and just take the film as a big dumb actioner then you too may enjoy it as much as I did.

One thing that the film left me with as I left the cinema was a desperate need to see the inevitable and fully justified directors cut when it's released on DVD as well as an urge to read the source material, Babylon Babies.